I woke up later than usual, having dreamed some sinking boats, some hiding naked in a car, some swimming.
great confident swimming & then I came. Masturbating to the book. I had been touching my clit on & off yesterday & today to no orgasm, but the stakes were lover: this is nat'l masturbation month, not national cum month. Oh. Oh.
I feel I'm reacquainting myself w/my intuitive orgasm. The one that erupts on its own, w/out some particular fantasy yelling at it -- I am ready then I
stop &
go to the
okay let's go over place
& then we do & it is
how it was before
when I was a
kid -- when orgasm & masturbation
didn't equal sexy porn time, or
whatever.
which isn't to say no, which isn't to say...
which is to say
I'm delighted to find or
REFIND
what existed in me
before.
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